Friday, July 28, 2006

GET HIGH TAKING BUS

As a follow up to my entry "GET HIGH ON THE ESCALATOR",
here's another entry on the "joys" of taking public transport.
Things that really amuses me..

Again, it is something that you can do to get your high! Haha..
Irritate the hell out of people..
or Just observe it as it unfounds the next time you are taking a bus..

There are a few categories of interesting people I've observed..

1) The Shield
These are the people who will definitely make excellent sportsmen/sportswomen.
They are the ones who will definitely be able to shield the ball in any game from competitors/opponents. (Shielding in sports is like "protecting" the ball frm the opponent)
These are the people who when they spot the bus, will begin their shielding techniques to be the first to enter.
a) As they spot the bus, they will choose their prime spot where the bus is likely to stop and stand soooooooooo close to the edge that they will put to shame any gymnast on a balancing beam.
b) Then as the bus slows as it tries to come to a stop, you can see these people move with their nimble feet as they shuffle their feet and side-step their way to shield the other waiting commuters from their only goal.. To be first at the door! The speed at which they shuffle and side-step will put our soccer players to shame.

2) The Cut Lane Master
These people are the nemesis of The Shields. Even with the skills of The Shields, they can lose out to these Cut Lane Masters if they are not careful.
These are the people who can be the last to reach the bus stop, but it doesn't change their goal of being first at the door too!
It doesn't matter that there are others who have been waiting for a long while for the bus, or that there is already a informal queue (or more aptly described as cluster) forming for the bus after The Shields, these Cut Lane Masters will do their stuff.
As The Shields are busy concentrating shielding the others, confidently thinking that victory is in hand, these Cut Lane Masters will approach from the blindspots.
All the way to the sides of the cluster formed.. they will try to squeeze in and cut lane to win the coveted prize of being the first one up the bus.

3) The Reccee Troopers
Once aboard the bus, a new breed is found. These are the Reccee Troopers. And usually these Reccee Troopers are well-trained in the art of shielding, cutting lane or both before they can exhibit their Reccee Trooper credentials.
These people (usually the first ones on the bus) will walk to a empty seat, place their hands on the seat handles... and... STOP dead in their tracks while there are people waiting to board the bus.
They stop so they can look towards the back of the bus to observe and search for a "better" seat while standing there blocking all the commuters trying to just move towards the back of the bus. The world has to stop for them while they search for a good seat (is it a feng shui thing?)..
If they find a "better" seat, they will move towards their kill and letting the world revolve once again.
Be glad if they do it once.. because they have the tendency to repeat their reccee acts a few times before they find their desired seats!..

So start training now people.. If you want to attain the titles above.. People have trained all their lives to be the masters..

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- Sharing my high..

9 comments:

faizah said...

WAHAHAHA i love this one...it tickles me crazy. haizzz...such people. got some shielding clans in woodlands interchange, u know. those aunties ahhh with their thick skin, nonchalantly come to the front of the Q, wn ppl are q-ing like crazy at the back. tsk tsk tsk!!!

cyndax said...

Yo mate,
As I was reading out loudly of your blog, my friend ask me if you are a gay guy.

He thinks you are bitching so much..
Well...i can intro you to him..so you can hook up with him...

haha

Ginseng Tonic Maker said...

Cyndax>> Hell NO!.. Not that I got anything against gays.. coz i think it's juz their personal choice.. like some guys like gals with long/short hair.. and some gals like fat asses..

It's juz my personal choice that i like gals!..

Ginseng Tonic Maker said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Ginseng Tonic Maker said...

faizah>> Glad you enjoyed the entry..
What are you waiting for?.. Maybe you should start to attain Cut Lane Master status haha..

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