Monday, July 31, 2006

I Have Changed?

Was taking a coffee break with a colleague sometime last week..
We were having some conversation,
When out of the blue, she caught me by surprise..
"... You have changed.. " (can't help it.. but a corny joke just came to my mind.. Nope.. I didn't change clothes then..)

I was taken aback.. so I asked, "Why? I've been working real hard and work-wise things are getting back into momenturm what.." etc..
And she replied that it's not about work and something along the line of me not being as positive/optimistic/ motivated/driven/ happy/ cheerful since my heartbreak...

I was pretty surprised because her comments came out of nowhere (and maybe because she said it so point-blank) and I thought I have been getting on with my life quite well already.. getting my life back in order etc..

I think it's inevitable that I've changed. But it's not because I still can't get over it or anything like that.. Because quite frankly, I think I've moved on from that stage.. I just think all our life experiences shape our character. And it was one hell of a life experience that I went through. The hurt and disappointment will probably never ever go away and I just hope I never will have to go through it again.

Is Pre-Heartbreak Me and Post-Heartbreak Me really very much different?

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker --


cyndax said...

I think there is really a diff between the pre and post.

I agree with your friend that the pre was a cheerful ben..The post...Hmm..well more mature but can sense a little negativity/sadness.

Although you had insisted many times, that you had walk out of that post-morterm.

But will be a good time for you to focus on work. But remember work hard and play hard. I work hard and didnt play nearly breakdown haha... now trying to play hard too..

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