Anti-Vulnerability Shield

I hate the feeling of not being in control.. of being vulnerable..
It may surprise my friends who are reading this..
Because I'm really a very easy-going and accomodating person bordering on the line of indecisiveness haha..

But I'm only indecisive on the small stuff haha.. like a self-help book says.. Don't Sweat The Small Stuff (I haven't read this yet though)..
For the "Big Stuff" though.. I can really be quite a control freak..

That's why I:

(1) Sold my motorbike
After only 1 year of riding when I was in uni.. Couldn't stand the feeling of vulnerability.. Like how I could be killed no matter how safely I was riding because of some irresponsible drivers..

(2) Chose not to be an employee
I don't want to be whining and complaining if I don't get my "deserved" pay or promotion.. And complain of "favourtism" etc if things don't go my way..
If it is to be.. It is up to me.. If I don't do well.. If I don't get the pay that I deserve.. I have no one else to blame but ME!.. So I choose to set my own career path.. set my own career pace.. and set my own PAY!...

(3) Matters of the Heart
That's one thing that I've learnt the hard way. There's no way for you to be in control! It's really about letting go and placing you faith, trust... EVERYTHING in the hands of the other party.. No matter how much you put into a relationship etc.. It can still leave you crushed.. Maybe it's because of what happened..
It's the greatest feeling of vulnerability.. and I HATE it..

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- Ginseng for invincibility!

Conversation of the Week

The Joy of Giving?

Colleague: I like Christmas more than New Year.. because during Christmas there's the joy of giving..

Me: But you didn't give me anything.. You should.. I'm trying to make you happy! Haha..

Colleague: Haha.. No lah.. It's like gathering with friends.. Then gift exchange mah..

Me: Then don't say joy of giving.. if you give and expect something in return.. that's the Joy of TRADING!!

Both: Hahaha...

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- I derive joy from receiving.. I can make you HAPPY anytime if you derive joy from giving!..

Merry Christmas!

"Believing in Father Christmas is important.
It trains our imaginations on the little lies..
so we can believe the big lies like justice, truth"
- Writer Terry Pratchett

There's nothing like telling things the way it is!
Luckily True Love is not on the list (or maybe it should?)

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- Too innocent for this big bad world..

LOVE

Spotted on a friend's blog..

"...I'd rather have bad times with you, than good times with someone else..
I'd rather be beside you in a storm, than safe and warm by myself..
I'd rather have hard times together, than to have it easy apart.."

How apt a description..

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- True Love.. Nourishes even better than ginseng tonic..

Hang In There..

8 more days.. Hang in there.. Argh...
I will be NORMAL once again when January comes around..
I'm sure.. I promise.. The stressed (anal) expression on my face will be gone..

I'm soooo close I can almost smell the prize..
The finishing line is near.. Hang In There!!...
Just that little bit more...

Never knew I could be so tough mentally..

I really want to go ice-skating when all this craze is over.. Even if it means crawling on all four =P

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- Some nourishment for the heart please..

The Last Minute Man...

The Last Minute Man will do a lot better if he can

1) Stop being so last minute
2) Stop being so stressed
3) Stop choosing shows that are way toooooo S.L.O.W

Can't wait for January to come..
So many things I want to do.. So many things i NEED to do..
Like clearing up the mess in my room..

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- Beginning to hate December.. Argh.. Haha..

The Line

Should be out for work appointments by now..
But the rain is way too heavy..
Luckily they are kind souls who will let me meet them at a later timing..
So I'm blogging til the rain goes away haha..

I don't blog much about my activities.. I don't post pics much..
But because it was such Great Company for lunch yesterday..
I'll talk about it and post some pics today..

Lunch at The Line. Buffet at Shangri-La Hotel.

Great food.. Great variety..

The food that I began with.

-- Many other things in between Haha.. --

The dessert that I ended with.

And the great company is.....

My mum and I.

With the photographer of the year award going to my Sis!

(In her defence, she pressed th button by mistake haha..)

Yup.. And that was the great company for lunch yesterday.

My Mum, my Sis and my Bro-in-law. We brought Mum out for her Bday lunch..

It's worth every single cent.. For the food.. the location.. and most importantly.. the family gathering!

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- The greatest love of all.. A mother's love..

And it's STILL raining!...

Conversation of the day..

Hubby (happily with a hint of pride): He was my secondary school classmate.

Wife (curtly): How many times do you want to tell me that?!

-- Awkward Silence --


Heard this conversation last night.
Sometimes it really makes me wonder why it has to be like this..
Of course I shouldn't judge, maybe the husband has really said it countless times til it is sooooo irritating..

I'm not a sexist.. I'm not saying ladies talk like that.. Men do too..
Sometimes I wonder why conversations can't be just a little more tactful.. with more love..

How about:

Wife (smiling): Yes Dear, you have told me before..
*And seal it with a BIG kiss*

-- Blissful Silence --

Same meaning.. Different tone.. Totally different outcome!


-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- It's not just what you say.. It's the way you say it..

Blah Blah Blah..

Had a conversation with my colleague today.. And it reminded me of an incident last week..
There I was.. At a bus stop near my home.. Waiting for my bus to head to office when this old couple.. Probably in their 50s came along..
The lady was talking.. Nothing unusual..
Except that she talked....


and talked....



and talked...




and talked...

Until all the man did was nod with the almost synchronised replies of.. ya.. umm.. ah.. (repeat)...

For a cool I think 5 minutes at least.. She was talking.. All the way!..
5 minutes of MONOLOGUE.. It's amazing!!.. Not easy!!..

That's not all... Sensing no response.. Or at least no significant responses.. She started using her finger to poke at him as she continued mumbling away.. So all in, I would think took a cool 10 minutes!.. (I didn't time though.. Just a guesstimate)
10 minutes of talking.. It MUST be a record of sorts.. 10 minutes of monologue!

And gals wonder.. Why guys don't listen?..
Because there's tooooooooooooo much to process if we listened to everything..=P

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- Say that again?

Bliss

Attended yet another wedding last night.. earlier in the day.. attended the party of my friend's daughter who is a month old..
How much we have all grown!!

Lost track of the number of weddings and ROMs this year of friends already...
So happy for all of them.. CONGRATS!!

It is just so blissful to find the love of your life..
And when I see the blissful faces of the brides and grooms..
It gives me hope that the magic of love still exists..

Though it'll probably take a teeny weeny bit longer for it to hit me..
After all the hurt I went through.. It's not easy for me to jump in whole heartedly again..
Though I'm sure it will happen (or at least I hope!! haha..).. sometime..

Searching for my fairytale...

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- ... and they lived, happily ever after...-The End-

All I need is Quality.. NOT Quantity..

One simple sentence.. So many applications..

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker --

Sleepless Vicious Cycle?

Had a terrible time trying to sleep the night before..
Really terrible..
Can't remember the last time I had a night like this.. (last december maybe? haha..)
I hope it's not going to be a once-a-year afair..

I couldn't sleep at all the whole night!!..
The WHOLE FREAKING NIGHT!!

Nothing much was on my mind (or is it TOO much till I can't tell? haha..).. And I didn't overload on my caffiene boost..
So it was pretty frustrating actually... It wasn't like I'm particulary stressed out..

In fact, last night should be able to sleep well..
Caught Happy Feet in the day with a friend.. A really funny show that really helped to destress.. Though I don't think it's particularly suitable for kids.. coz of the sexual connotations in some parts of the movie.. Weird.. since it should be a kids' show..

Anyway.. So with me hardly getting my rest.. It was time to get out of bed way too soon after a night of tossing and turning... Had to be in office early..
To cut the story short.. With the lack of rest.. Feeling unwell.. and basically just a walking zombie.. Made my decision to cut the day short and go back for some rest..

Which leads me back to my title.. Because I took a nap.. Now I don't feel sleepy..
I just hope it's not going to be another Long.. Sleepless... Night...

--Ginseng Tonic Maker-- I need somebody to pat me to sleep...

KTV Fun..

Went for a KTV session with some of my colleagues on Friday..
We badly needed to destress..

People who know me well will know that though I go KTV sometimes with my friends.. I don't sing.. For a variety of reasons.. but mainly..
1) I can't sing
2) I don't want to sing
3) I don't know the songs well
4) I can't sing even if I want to as I didn't study hard enough for chinese

So to save myself the humiliation.. and to save my friends who are in the room from my torturous singing (afterall KTV is meant to be for fun, relaxation and destressing haha..).. I just don't sing.. And I'm perfectly happy that way.. So don't EVER try to force me to sing!!..

So why do I go?.. As usual.. It's the company.. I just go so I can listen to the songs.. the singing.. the gossiping.. the fun and laughter etc.. So leave me alone to drink.. eat the snacks.. eat the fruits.. listen to the gossip.. and talking rubbish.. Thank you very much!..

So what weird/interesting observations about KTV I made? Here goes.. (Note: It's with no reference to any particular KTV session.. and no reference to any particular person!)

1) People who don't sing in KTV - Ahem.. Like me!.. Please read above..

2) The most heard word in a KTV session.. "EJECT!" - The moment the singing is done.. always.. somebody will shout.. EJECT!!..always! haha.. Nobody bothers with the ending MV and music.. So as to save time and maybe squeeze in a song or two Haha..

3) Should have studied harder in school! - Typical local lousy chinese standard style.. Sing-Sing-Sing-*silence*-Eh how to read that ah?.. Quite amusing sometimes haha.. But I'm not making fun of anybody.. Because my Chinese is very lousy.. And I'm not proud of the fact..

4) Slow to warm.. Then overheat singers - They are the ones who at the beginning.. Eh no lah I don't sing much/ Sore throat/ Not feeling well/ don't feel like singing today singers.. but they go on to sing like they are giving mini concerts haha.. (no reference to anybody in particular!!!)

5) Nevermind.. you take the mic.. you sing.. - But then..they can sing without mic.. And can still sing louder than the ones with mics.. Hehe..

6) Has gone on a few KTV sessions with different group of friends.. And I've always noticed.. hardly anybody sings English songs.. Why?

Note: Purely an entry for fun.. No reference in particular to anybody or any of the limited KTV sessions I've went.. Entry over-dramatised I'm sure.. And please do not ostracise me from all future KTV sessions Haha.. Because even though I don't sing.. I still enjoy a KTV session once in a while..

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- No offence.. Keep on singing people haha..

Hidden Meaning?

I think sometimes people read TOO much into what I write..
Or maybe I want it that way?.. Haha...
Take it at face value people.. I'm not as "deep" as some of you think...

Hot questions so far....

1) Eh.. Who's the "great company"?

2) What signal are you talking about?

3) So who planted the temptation for cakes etc?.. Is it the same "great company"?

Make your own deductions.. Jump to your own conclusions..
Or just stop reading too much into what I write!..

Time for my sleep.. It has been a long sleepless night..

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- Panda eyed...

Congratulations!

This entry is dedicated to my dear friend..

Congrats on your very first article Mr. PhotoJournalist cum ex-calendar model cum ex-condo model (though nobody can verify the latter haha..)..
May it be the start of great things to come, with your "unique" way of writing!..

Keep on writing..

Cheers!!

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- Mainstream english paper my foot!.. It's a bloody tabloid!! Haha..

Blogs

Some random thoughts on blogs.. In no particular order or flow.. Just whatever pops up in my mind..

1) A lot more people read your blog than you think!
It's funny how there are a lot more people reading my blog than I thought..
When you meet somebody you haven't been in touch with for a while and they go like they just talked to you the night before..
"Eh.. you went XXX and you didn't ask me along ah.."
"So who is this "company" that you are talking about?"
And a friend who's msn nick used a quote on my blog..

Leave some comments and stop snooping around! haha..

2) No you don't know him/her!
Had this strange encounter some time back.. I was at the bus stop when I saw this gal and her bf.. She looked very very familiar.. If you know me, I can remember faces quite well.. (but i suck at names though..).. So for a while I was thinking where have I seen her before.. The processing is quite slow because I meet lots of people in my line of work..
And then it struck me.. she's like a fren's best friend.. And no.. I have never met her previously.. It's just my friend posts a LOT of pictures on her blog.. and coz they are such good friends, I keep seeing her face too..

It's a pretty weird feeling actually.. it feels as though you know the person.. but in fact you don't!.. just that sometimes through the blog.. you know how the person is like etc haha.. Weird..

But no such problems here.. I don't post pics of friends.. I hardly post pics in fact.. I only have ONE pic of myself somewhere along here coz I don't photoshop haha..
And everybody is a "friend", "good buddy", "work buddy", "company" haha..
I respect privacy of others..

3) The demise of the get-to-know you stage?
It used to be that friendship was forged over time.. And how much you know about a person depended on how long you have known each other.. For simple information like where the person lived.. schooled.. likes/dislikes.. etc etc..
But now.. all you have to do.. is take a look at the person's blog..
And it's as though you've known the person forever.. and you've grown with the person! You know where they like to hang out.. Who their friends are.. and what they like to do..

I really don't know if that's such a good thing.. because people change over time.. And it may cloud your feelings/thinking about somebody just because of history..
And there are times when people blog when in extreme emotions of anger (or whatever other feelings).. It may not be representative of the person in general..

That's all for now.. Too tired to blog liao..

Sidetrack abit: Somebody planted the temptation of cakes, muffins, cupcakes, pastries etc in my mind...
If you are reading this.. you know who you are! haha..
Hopefully can get to taste it soon...

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- Drop me a comment or two!

Title

Choosing a title for a blog entry.. Is a blog entry by itself haha..
Here goes.. With many other variations and permuations Haha..
Take your pick..

1) Blogs
2) Blogging
3) Blog on Blogs
4) Blogging about Blogs
5) Blogger blogs about blogs
6) Blogger blogging about bloggers who blogs
7) Blogger blogging about blogs of bloggers who blogs
8) Blogging blogger blogs about blogs of blogging bloggers who blogs
9) Blogging Blogger blogging blogs on blogs of blogging bloggers' blogs (Say it as fast as you can haha..)

Haha.. It's as good as somebody going "Hi, I'm a cook who cooks."
It's over-dramatisation.. It's crappy..
It's the same ol' corny me..

Wait for the new entry.. Titled: Anyone of the above


-- Gingseng Tonic Maker -- Maker of ginseng tonic

Your signal is loud and clear..
And I'd like to thank you for it!

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- Roger.. Over and out..

Interesting Quote

Was about to go to bed when a friend sent me a link..
"Hey I think you should take a look at this.. You need it! haha"..
And so his message went..

It's some "Inspirational Movie"..
About forgiveness..
The thing that struck me most was this simple sentence at the beginning..

"To forgive is not to forget..
To forgive is to remember that nobody is perfect.."

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- Perfectly Imperfect.. Imperfectly Perfect...

You Gotta Check This Out!

A friend of mine asked me to check this youtube clip out..
And if you guys had read today's Sunday Times regarding the complaints about S'pore's MRT system and all..
I think S'pore is doing not too bad haha..

http://www.kahsoon.com/2006/09/22/lrt-in-japan/

Ya ya.. I know can link youtube clip and all that..
But I just don't feel like spending time to find out how to do it now.. yet..
So ya.. make some effort to click it..

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- SQUEEZE...

Happy Family...

Had plans to go Sentosa today.. And frankly.. That was about the only thing that I was looking forward to ALL week.. With all the stress and work.. Had really wanted to relax and have fun..
Unfortunately.. Things didn't work out.. And Sentosa didn't happen..
~ Sighz ~

As I had wanted to go Sentosa the whole week.. Didn't plan any appointments til the evening.. So the day was about to go to waste.. When thankfully.. a buddy of mine was free to go swimming with me...

Actually the main point of the story is.. As we were swimming at CDANS (Which is like SAFRA but for Civil Defence for people who don't know).. We saw a lot of parents with kids at the pool.. Swimming with the kids or mostly accompanying their kids to swimming lessons..

So my buddy and I were having a cup of coffee.. And we came to the conclusion.. For all the success or money that we are working hard for..
At the end of the day.. It's actually all just to be able to have the freedom.. and choice on when to work..
So that weekends like this.. We can just bring the kids for a swim as a family..
And spend time together with the family..

Sometimes.. I feel that all I want in life is very simple..
It really is all about the family..
But sometimes.. the simplest thing.. is the hardest to achieve..

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- Feeling emo again..

Emotional Ride

I have a emotional roller-coaster career..
Like I mentioned in my previous post..
I can be feeling super-high or super-low..
Seems like there's no in-between..
Or maybe that's just me..
See most things in black and white..

And I'm feeling like I'm a Super Star that can do no wrong today..

Think it's not the best of times to be around me..
Not that I have any outburst when I'm down..
Nor do I get euphoric when I'm super-high..
But many pple have commented that I have this super-stressed(read: anal)
look on my face Haha..
It's subconscious I assure you..
So if you see me around or bump into me.. It's NOT that I dislike you..

It's such an emotional roller-coaster that maybe it makes finding a partner that little bit tougher..
I think a partner must fall into 3 categories:
1) Join the career
2) Super understanding
3) Equally ambitious

But then again.. I think it applies to most people and most careers hahaha..

Haha.. Another stupid post that is too long to be deleted and not very proudly brought to you by...
-- Ginseng Tonic Maker --

Sleepless Night..

One of those nights when I'm feeling really crappy..
As though nothing seems to be going right..

Some days I feel like everything I touch turns into gold..
Some days it's as though I keep digging up shit..

Sentosa.. Sentosa.. The only thing that I'm looking forward to.. And the only thing that can make me smile on a night like this...

You are just catching me blog on a very bad night..

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- I need some ginseng..

Photoshop

My buddy sent this edited pic to me over msn.

His message read..

"There's something called photoshop u know.."

The message that I knew he wanted to write..

"Are you stupid or what?!"

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- Stupidity is bliss..

Time Off

Took the whole day off on Saturday.. Not the best of time to be relaxing.. But I think everybody needs it once in a while to keep ourselves sane Haha..
Especially with all the stress and deadline coming up...




Started the day at Bakerzin.. The cake was what I had.. Loved it.. Very Chocolaty.. But it probably was a bad decision considering the plans we had for the evening Haha.. But looking at the cakes on display.. I just couldn't help but pick this one hehe..






Then it was off to Dim Sum Dollies - The Little Shop of Horrors.. It's an adaptation of some broadway musical (I think.. But I know for sure it's not a original script)..
It was good!.. Really entertaining.. (Especially this part about the Parking Aunties).. Entertaining as it is.. It held a deeper message.. About the conscience/price/choices people make and pay for fame and success..






Since Dim Sum Dollies ended around 5pm.. And we had to wait til 8pm.. We decided to have some snacks.. We went Hooters.. (NOTE: The pic is not mine.. It's found online..)
The location was NOT suggested by me.. My friend wanted to check out the Hooters Gals (which she wasn't too impressed with haha).. And the buffalo wings (now that was good!..)






Then it was the Chocolate Buffet at Fullerton Hotel.. Looks good doesn't it?.. The thing I was most impressed with though was the service.. Because they'll clear the plates even though it's not completely finished.. It makes the experience more enjoyable coz we can sample the different things and not have to stuff ourselves silly..
But the VERDICT: Service and ambience makes it really enjoyable.. Food was so-so.. The kind of thing that is a must-try.. But probably worth only one visit..

Most importantly.. The company was great

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- Ginseng tea to cool the heatiness..

Conversation of the Day..

Location: Coffee Shop
Parties Involved: (1) Drinks uncle (2) Lady buying drinks

(English subtitles by yours truly..)

Lady: Uncle, got Milo?
Uncle: Yes.
Lady: Hot one?
Uncle: Have.
Lady: Oh ok.. Then you give me one..............




............ bottle of mineral water..............



*Uncle scratched head*
*I nearly choked on my food*

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker --

Weirdo!

Think I'm going crazy.. I'm starting to enjoy the stress I'm going through right now haha..
I'm such a weirdo!!..

Probably it's because I'm starting to due better with stress..
Don't have to worry about not spending enough time with anybody..
Look forward to the once a week soccer session..
Enjoy the company of going out with friends..
Maybe it's because of what happened this year.. After being not able to work for about 3 months.. To be still close to accomplishing my goals feels like a major achievement already haha..
But close is not enough.. I want to HIT it!...

Really looking forward to Saturday.. Decided to reward myself by taking the whole day off..
Will be catching Dim Sum Dollies.. Not sure if it's the company I'm looking forward to or the show haha..
but I sure hope the show is good!.. It will be held at Victoria Theatre.. If only the location is Esplanade.. Coz I have not caught anything at Esplanade yet.. Should have caught Forbidden City.. Oh well..
No matter.. It's who you watch it with that matters..

My friend mentioned it seems that I've been catching shows/musicals/plays like these..
But I haven't caught that many.. YET.. Haha.. It helps that I have somebody to watch with..
So far I've only caught Grease and Broadway Beng.. with Dim Sum Dollies coming up.. But I'd like to set the record straight that I'm not trying to be arty-farty.. I've been more interested in shows that are more entertaining... Notre Doum (however you spell that).. Phantom of the Oprea don't interest me..
But then again.. I may watch Phantom of the Opera.. only because it's like such a classic.. Oops.. Arty-Farty me? haha..

I would love to catch Stomp if they ever come back to Spore again..
To catch Kumar in action next?

-- Ginsen Tonic Maker -- Work hard.. Play hard..

IF

I've never really liked the word "IF"..
I've always felt that the word "IF" carries a negative connotation..
How many times do we hear people or ourselves say

"If only.."

I try not to leave things to chance.. and I try to do my best so I do not regret when I don't get my desired outcomes.. so there's no room for "if only.."
but of course.. It's always easier said than done..

Then recently this really interesting person (who never fails to amaze me and bring a smile to my face) said this to me..

"Because of IF.. There is Hope"

Interesting way of looking at it, don't you think?

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- Even a negative can be positive..

My all-time favourite..

I'm looking at cars again.. Thanks to some bad influence.. *ahem*.. You know who you are haha..
Since I was looking at cars.. Can't help but went looking at my all-time favourite car again..
It's the Nissan 350Z... Also known as Fairlady (but nobody seems to call it as fairlady anymore)..
I juz absolutely LOVE it..
Even more than the more expensive cars like BMW's Z4.. and Lexus' SC etc..
Comparatively.. 350Z is considered quite cheap.. There was a guy driving 350z while I was in uni!! Can you imagine that.. It doesn't hurt to have rich parents haha.. (but i'm not discounting the fact that some undergrads have biz that are so successful they can afford one..)..
I do hope I will get to own one someday though..

HOPE because.. Being me.. I'd probably think that it's not practical to own a car like that.. And thinking about the costs.. I think it's more worth it to buy 2 cars haha..
Moreover.. being the filial son that I am *ahem*.. This car can't drive my mum around when/if i get attached/married etc..
But of course.. The ideal scenerio will be like someone I know.. a MPV for the family.. a sports car for ego trip.. and recently a JEEP for FUN!!!..
Imagine that!!..

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- Hot Wheels...

Apprentice is back..

Apprentice is back.. One of my favourite shows..
I don't usually chase any TV shows..
But Apprentice is one show that I've always been hooked on..
I'm so hooked on it that in the past, I would rush home from Tampines to my house to be in time to catch the show.. Or I would take a cab home after the show!

It's very representative of the real world.. How people work on tasks.. Office politics etc.. Thankfully I'm not in a office corporate environment.. Don't think I can survive all the scheming.. stab-your-back hypocrisy..
All I need to do is concentrate on my own work.. Thank Goodness!

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker --

Quote of the Day

"Success is not achieved with the absence of obstacles..
Sucess is achieved despite the presence of obstacles"

An original quote from yours truly..
Maybe one day I'll have enough quotes of my own to write a book or something haha..
I've always been fascinated with quotes.. Short and sharp.. Straight to the point..
Simple sentences that hold so much wisdom and truth...
Thought of the quote today on my way home..
After working the whole day today.. My mind was just racing non-stop on the bus..
Maybe it's the last quarter.. All the excitement and anxiety of the final quarter is here once again..
The excitement of the final burst and joy in achieving your goals and personal bests.. And the anxiety of not achieving it..

Sometimes it's so easy to give up.. Quitting is always an easy option..
Especially with what has happened in my life this year..
It'd be such a easy option.. I can just blame it on what has happened..
But thankfully I didn't.. And thankfully I'm not..
Althought it has definitely affected my plans..
I'll just have to keep on fighting as hard as I can..

Never quit people..
In life, there are always going to be obstacles.. Don't let obstacles be an excuse for quitting..
I'm not going to blame a failed relationship if I don't hit my goals this year..
I just have to blame myself for not being able to pick myself up fast enough..

It's easy to look at people who are successful and be full of envy..
And sometimes others like to say these successful people are lucky..
But they only look at the end result of success and hardly at the process..
Nobody looks at the shit these people went through..
But everybody wants to enjoy the success..
I'm sure there are those few that are really lucky.. Maybe it's the family fortunes.. Maybe it's lottery.. Maybe they just happen to in the right place at the right time..
But don't let luck determine your destiny.. Never Quit in the face of obstacles and go into self-pity expecting the sympathy from the world..
Coz I'm sure..

"Success is not achieved in the absence of obstacles..
Success is achieved despite the presence of obstacles"

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- A ginseng a day.. Clears the obstacles away..

I Need You Around.. To Remind Me What Not To Become..

Same-Same but Different

Recently just got some photos from my friends..
Friends who "owed" me the photos haha..
Looking through the photos.. It really brought back a lot of memories..
Some of the events, pictures.. I've already clean forgotten!..
But look at them and thinking back.. It's really very emo sometimes haha..
That's why I love looking at photos, letter, cards I've kept over the years..
Once in a while when I have the time and feeling emo haha..
Well.. Coz memories fade.. But all these momentos serve as reminders of happy (or sad) times in our lives..

It's really amazing sometimes.. How we'ver grown over the years..
From my long floppy hair when I was younger.. Then my dyed hair with goatee.. My ear piercings when I was younger.. And now my short hair..
Then from my sharp chiselled features.. fit and toned body.. to now when my weight keep going up and down (but mostly up haha).. When my friends meet me.. some say I lost weight.. Some say I gained weight.. I guess it depends on when they last see me haha..

Then the friends and company in the pictures.. Some you are still close with.. Some you are just thankful that you are keeping in touch.. And some you wonder what happened.. Coz they are out of your lives completely, regrettably so..
Unfortunately some groups of friends get smaller over the years for one reason or another.. But sometimes it's a good thing.. The ones that remain.. You can be sure.. are worth being friends with..

Sometimes.. Some friends.. Some meetings.. Some gatherings..
As the group size changes.. As the relationship changes.. At different stages of our lives.. The feeling.. Like a friend says..
Same-Same but different

-- Gingseng Tonic Maker -- Memories to last a lifetime..

It's a Tough Time

A friend of mine is going through some tough time..
Thanks (or no thanks) to relationships again..
Seeing her going through it.. Brings back some memories I would rather forget..
What she's going through.. Is almost a replica of what I went through..
Sometimes I wonder what the world is coming to..
I fear another relationship failure.. Or rather.. I fear another relationship failure in the same circumstances..
I think it'll be too much for me to handle.. And perhaps it is something that's really holding me back..

Dropped her an sms and sometimes it amazes me what I can come up with..
You guys can quote me the great philosopher in future haha..
"In life, shit happens..
But we need these shit once in a while..
Or life will be one big constipation!"

Was reading her blog when I saw something her friend told her which I find very true and interesting.. (edited version)
"When you find the love of your life in future,
you'll look back and realise how foolish you are..
to shed all these tears."

So my dear friend who's going through this shit..
Cheer up!.. Jio me for kopi or smthg..
I totally understand what you are going through.. Coz i went through the same shit myself! Haha..

Time will heal the wounds.. Slowly but surely.. And when you gain your senses.. You will be GLAD it happened.. Be thankful.. Once in a while, we need to clear some shit out of our life haha.. Moreover, better a breakup now than a divorce in future!..

"And when you start to miss me..
Remember..
You let me go.."
- As plagarised from Nickle's blog

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- Is love worth the shit?

Money Sense

I just got a new handphone recently (2 days ago!).. Sony Ericsson k800i I think..
Some people may wonder why am I blogging about this..
But some who know me will know that this is NEWS! Haha..
Because I'm so watchful of my spending..
I've been talking about buying phone and digi cam for such a loooonnng time..
And even when I was buying.. My buddy can't help but feel frustrated at my indecisiveness Haha..
PDA-Phone?.. Camera phone?.. Nokia?.. Sony-Ericsson?..
But this blog is not about the phone.. (which is good by the way.. so far so good.. the camera is pretty great!)

This blog entry is more about how i watch my spending..
The temptation to spend is definitely there..
The temptation of buying a car is so great.. esp since some of my colleagues have bought or are thinking of buying.. and we're frm the same batch which makes our income pretty close..
But unlike them, I'm of the view that I'm not ready to commit yet.. Coz the cost will be exorbitant.. Instalments, petrol, parking, fines, servicing.. and the list goes on forever.. Maybe in another year or 2.. MAYBE

Maybe.. Because, when I first started working.. I was thinking if my income hits $5k a month I'll probably buy a car as i think I'll be comfortable affording it.. But now, I feel that maybe $5k isn't enough also.. Maybe thinking of hitting $10k first..
The bar seems to keep rising..

I'm a person who doesn't like financial obligation I suppose.. Don't like to be in debt.. If I overspend on shopping or holiday or gadgets etc.. At least I just feel bad for a while and watch my spending in the next few months.. and things will be pretty much the same.. But if I buy a car without being ready.. I'll be affected for years!!..

My work buddy said to me.. We will only be 25 ONCE .. Now don't buy.. Next time older got money then buy it'll be nothing impressive already..
And knowing the way I keep considering and thinking b4 I make a purchase.. He passed a remark something along the line..
You work so hard, earn the money.. So young but think so much.. Don't know saving for what..

Haha.. sometimes I wonder why too..

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- Planting seeds for my harvest..

Lousy Entries

Reading my entries on my descriptions of Korea..
I think they are very lousy Haha..
That explains why in school I've always written argumentative essays/compositions..
And I was quite a fan of General Paper in JC..

My descriptive essays / compositions are really terrible..
And now I'm proving the point all over again haha..

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker --

Hotspring in Korea

It's another sleepless night.. Not sure if it's the stress.. Or the date.. Or too much on my mind.. Or the ginseng tea is working so well I'm getting over-hyper haha..
Since I can't get to sleep.. Might as well do another blog entry..

Since someone requested that I blog about my hotspring experience in Korea.. I'll accede to it and write about my experience.. But just to set the record STRAIGHT.. There's NO adventure with Melvin!!! Haha.. Don't make it sound so weird!..

The Hot Spring in Korea (or at least the one we went to).. everybody has to go in naked.. yes.. naked.. even the ladies.. but of course the males and females are seperated (but I hear there are other hot springs that have common ones for both males and females!)..

The "fun" began way before we reached the Hot Spring.. Because the ladies, especially the aunts and Indonesian ladies that joined our tour group.. Were like giggling and laughing so hard as they contemplated whether to go to the hot springs.. and whether exceptions can be made etc etc.. It was pretty hilarious actually haha..
For the guys, there wasn't anything of that sort.. I think army has trained us well..

The hot spring was a great experience.. my first time ever.. there were different hot springs available.. with various temperatures (some cold, some hot).. and with various herbs, mints, ginseng etc.. It was a great experience.. But I don't think I'm a very big fan of it haha.. People who know me will know that I like to try everything (or at least most things.. ) at least ONCE.. So usually I'm game for most things..

I'm not that big a fan because.. I don't find enjoyment in letting my body go through temperatures that are not THAT comfortable.. It was either too hot or too cold!.. and being in the ginseng hot spring.. makes me feel like a chicken.. being boiled to make chicken ginseng soup! haha..

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- Boiled Ginseng Chicken..

Back View of the "Earth God"

Any resemblance? Haha..

Jeju Island

Finally blogging about Korea..
Hope this entry goes through without problem coz I was typing when don't know what happened everything was deleted.. Argh nevermind..

Here's a pic from Korea's Jeju Island..
I'm between statues of 2 "earth gods".. You'll see plenty in Jeju island.. The reason why they have them is to boost up their "yang qi".. Coz in Jeju island.. The females outnumber the males.. Because it being an island.. They fish for a living (not sure abt now though).. So as fishing for a living goes.. Not everybody make it back.. So naturally over time.. the females outnumber the males.. so the "ying qi" stronger...

The statues are meant to balance the qi.. Something very interesting is that.. the back of the statues.. they shape it to look like the male sexual organ haha.. we were happily taking pics of the statues when the tour guide shocked us with this revelation haha..

Was trying to upload the pic.. but it gave me some problems.. so I'll try to upload it next time then..

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker --

Always Look on the Bright Side of Life!

Had wanted to write and post some pics about my korea trip..
But I think this entry is a lot more important..
It's for all my friends out there!!.. (and anybody else who's reading haha..)

Been hearing about.. or reading from blogs.. or observing..
That things haven't exactly been very smooth sailing for some..

Is it the age?.. coz now like most around 25yrs old..
Quarter-life crisis ah? haha..
Feeling lost.. relationship problems etc etc..

Well Cheer Up pple.. Hang in there!!...
Everything happens for a reason..
And things will turn out well once the rough ride is over..

I KNOW!

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- Ginseng for you?

Home Sweet Home

Holidays are always over way toooooo fast..
Well.. It was an OK trip..
It's not those WOW trips where you get excited and start "selling" the country to your friends..
Mainly because it's a group tour i guess..
I hate group tours.. Long bus rides.. Rushed itenary..
Partly because it was mostly a scenic trip.. which I'm not totally crazy over.. thank goodness there were theme parks.. and most importantly..
Luckily there were great company of colleagues!..

Will try to blog abt the trip (or whatever i can remember!) over e next few days..
Stay tuned for the pics.. Will upload some when i get them.. or check out my friendster alternatively...

Way too sleepy already.. That's all for now..

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- Sipping Ginseng Tea as i blog =)

Seoul Far, (Not) Seoul Good?!

Flying off to Korea on Monday for a 8-days holiday with my colleagues..
I should be over the moon and feeling excited because I love to travel and I've never been to Korea right??

But somehow it isn't so.. And I can't really pin-point why..

Is it because of the stress I'm feeling? With the year coming to an end, at the moment this feels more like a distraction to my work than a celebration or holiday..
Is it because unlike our trip to Koh Samui last year, we have to fork out every single cent because we didn't meet the challenge set out by our manager?
Is it because unlike my past holidays, I fear I will be feeling lonely this year?
Is it because the Hong Kong trip has left such a bitter taste in my mouth, it's like the nightmare that doesn't go away?

I wish I know why.. It could actually be a combination of all the reasons listed above..
Or maybe I'm thinking way too much again..
Who knows.. I just have to wait for Monday to come.. When I reach the airport.. And with work out of my mind.. I'm sure I'll feel excited about the trip.. I'm sure I'll enjoy the trip.. and it'll be a case of..

Seoul Far, Seoul VERY Good..

(Hmm.. Time to buy a digi cam?)

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- Land of Ginseng.. Here I come..

Arty Farty Fun

Never thought I would enjoy what I would term Arty Farty in the past.. But hey, Singapore is so small.. There's nothing much to do anyway..
And sooner or later we will all get tired of shopping, movies and clubbing haha..
So ya.. going to blog a little abt the 2 Arty Farty Fun I had recently..

WOMAD last night was fun. Good friends with a cousin.
It was a good experience on the whole.
Lots of sweating (it's at Fort Canning what do you think?).. Lots of Ang Mohs (told you it's Arty Farty Haha..).. Lots of dancing and swaying..
In short.. It's all about letting your hair down and sweating it out..
WOMAD stands for World Music, Arts and Dance (I think..)..
It's some festival thingy with performances, screening of artistic films etc..
But next year must be better prepared.. Will go fully equipped with mat, basket of finger food and drinks/wine etc..
Picnic under the stars as we enjoy the performances!..

Broadway Beng was entertaining.. More so than perhaps Grease that I caught earlier this year.. Think it's just different..
Coz Ben was very entertaining coz it's like a dance, musical, songs, stand-up comedy all-in-one.. and also coz it was very localised.. Lotz of Hokkien!
Whereas Grease was more of just a dance and music show.. And having watched the movie.. Maybe having to squeeze everything into the musical left the plot a bit thin..

I better watch my spending.. coz it's not cheap if i keep catching such shows!.. But I am watching my spending.. otherwise I would have given in to my temptation to catch Forbidden City too haha.. So I'm trying hard to resist..

But hmm.. Dim Sum Dollies anybody?

--Ginseng Tonic Maker-- Bitten by the Arty Farty Buggy..

You've Got Spam

"Uh-oh" goes the ring-tone of my SMS.
And it really irritates me when it's spam.
Receive 30% off... Retrive details of how... Promotion available now.. etc..

The thing is, I don't feel as irritated when it's email spam.
And my polling results (of maybe poll size 5 friends), feels the same way.
So i gave it some thought. That's why sometimes my friends say I think too much (read: Bo Liao)

My conclusion. The reasons why we don't get as irritated when it's email spam is because:

1) It's such a big problem, we've given up while SMS spam is still pretty within control
2) Email accounts come free (mostly). So like all free things, we put up with the inconveniences whereas for SMSes, we pay for subscription and thus expectations are higher.
3) We usually have some time on hand and prepared when we check emails, so we are prepared to face email spam whereas for SMSes, we are usually caught in our daily activities.

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker--

Binging

I'm binging again.. Binging on food..
Just like in the past when I was studying for exams..
Whenever I'm stressed I tend to eat too much..
Consciously or Subconsciously..

Think I'm stressed.. Because I'm eating way tooooo much..
Luckily I stocked up on fruits and vege.. so that helps..
Fruits and Vege are supposed to be good for health..
But still, I gotta watch it.. Because not THAT much, I'm sure haha..

The season of stress is here again..
Final quarter push..

Don't give up!

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- Stressed out..

Fireworks - Singapore Team

Some pictures of the fireworks on Tuesday by the Singapore Team.

Thanks Zohri!

Fireworks - Italy Team

Some of the Pics from my secondary school buddy of the fireworks we caught on Saturday.
It was put up by the team from Italy and I must say.. It was GREAT!

Some of the techniques that I saw for the first time..
1) Fireworks bouncing off the water.. REPEATEDLY..
2) Fireworks.. the sparks.. hanging in the air and floating in the air with the wind as there were small parachutes attached to them. (How amazing is that?!)
3) Fireworks with colour only appearing at its tips towards the end..

Hope the ones put up by the other teams are as good.. If I do catch them..

Firsts..

Conducted my first recruitment interview on Saturday.
It was really a great learning experience.
It was pretty fun and interesting actually to be the "interviewer".
All the practices and role-plays with my work buddy was nothing like the real thing.
Nothing beats experiencing the real thing and then REALLY think about it and learn from it rather than just talking and discussing about it.
I will only get better!

I'd probably be getting some stick from some friends for saying this..
They'd probably say I'm too emotional/sentimental and I think too much..
But I think that is not necessarily a bad thing.. so here goes..
Watched my first fireworks on Saturday without that certain someone.
Not that it made me upset or affected my mood or anything..
It was just a thought that came to my mind..

First clubbing session on Saturday to about 5 in the morning.
Never would have thought that I could have that kind of energy.
Well, one reason why I clubbed til so late was probably because it was pretty fun..
Ended up chatting and partying a little with this group of 4 cabin crew that was beside us..
One of the stewardess was like teasing me..
But I must admit I enjoyed it..Cheap thrill.. Haha..
Another reason is because it was going to be like my "last" clubbing session. "last" as in, in future will probably just go if it's some birthday/holiday/gathering/celebration kind of thing.. and not just because I feel bored on weekends..
Well, not like I have been clubbing A LOT but it's still way too often by my standards..
So I want to spend my time more constructively, not to mention save my money and more importantly my liver haha..
So we shall see how it goes..

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- Mentality Now: Work first, everything else (or at least most things) can wait..

I'm So Much Weaker Than I thought
I'm So Much Weaker Than I Thought
I'm So Much Weaker Than I thought
I'm So Much Weaker Than I thought
I'm So Much Weaker Than I Thought

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- In need of Superwoman?

Things I Wana Do In The Near Future

None of those big dreams, world peace, save the world stuff..
Just random thoughts of things I want to do for self-gratification..
In the near future.. Just for personal experience..
Before I get too old for them..

1) Bungee Jump
2) Sky Dive
3) Scuba Dive
4) Climb Mountain (even the small ones in M'sia)
5) Water Rafting
6) Wake Board

Kakis needed.. More than welcomed..
People who got lobang or know how I can get started, drop me a msg..

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- In need of a high..

I Have Changed?

Was taking a coffee break with a colleague sometime last week..
We were having some conversation,
When out of the blue, she caught me by surprise..
"... You have changed.. " (can't help it.. but a corny joke just came to my mind.. Nope.. I didn't change clothes then..)

I was taken aback.. so I asked, "Why? I've been working real hard and work-wise things are getting back into momenturm what.." etc..
And she replied that it's not about work and something along the line of me not being as positive/optimistic/ motivated/driven/ happy/ cheerful since my heartbreak...

I was pretty surprised because her comments came out of nowhere (and maybe because she said it so point-blank) and I thought I have been getting on with my life quite well already.. getting my life back in order etc..

I think it's inevitable that I've changed. But it's not because I still can't get over it or anything like that.. Because quite frankly, I think I've moved on from that stage.. I just think all our life experiences shape our character. And it was one hell of a life experience that I went through. The hurt and disappointment will probably never ever go away and I just hope I never will have to go through it again.

Is Pre-Heartbreak Me and Post-Heartbreak Me really very much different?

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker --

GET HIGH TAKING BUS

As a follow up to my entry "GET HIGH ON THE ESCALATOR",
here's another entry on the "joys" of taking public transport.
Things that really amuses me..

Again, it is something that you can do to get your high! Haha..
Irritate the hell out of people..
or Just observe it as it unfounds the next time you are taking a bus..

There are a few categories of interesting people I've observed..

1) The Shield
These are the people who will definitely make excellent sportsmen/sportswomen.
They are the ones who will definitely be able to shield the ball in any game from competitors/opponents. (Shielding in sports is like "protecting" the ball frm the opponent)
These are the people who when they spot the bus, will begin their shielding techniques to be the first to enter.
a) As they spot the bus, they will choose their prime spot where the bus is likely to stop and stand soooooooooo close to the edge that they will put to shame any gymnast on a balancing beam.
b) Then as the bus slows as it tries to come to a stop, you can see these people move with their nimble feet as they shuffle their feet and side-step their way to shield the other waiting commuters from their only goal.. To be first at the door! The speed at which they shuffle and side-step will put our soccer players to shame.

2) The Cut Lane Master
These people are the nemesis of The Shields. Even with the skills of The Shields, they can lose out to these Cut Lane Masters if they are not careful.
These are the people who can be the last to reach the bus stop, but it doesn't change their goal of being first at the door too!
It doesn't matter that there are others who have been waiting for a long while for the bus, or that there is already a informal queue (or more aptly described as cluster) forming for the bus after The Shields, these Cut Lane Masters will do their stuff.
As The Shields are busy concentrating shielding the others, confidently thinking that victory is in hand, these Cut Lane Masters will approach from the blindspots.
All the way to the sides of the cluster formed.. they will try to squeeze in and cut lane to win the coveted prize of being the first one up the bus.

3) The Reccee Troopers
Once aboard the bus, a new breed is found. These are the Reccee Troopers. And usually these Reccee Troopers are well-trained in the art of shielding, cutting lane or both before they can exhibit their Reccee Trooper credentials.
These people (usually the first ones on the bus) will walk to a empty seat, place their hands on the seat handles... and... STOP dead in their tracks while there are people waiting to board the bus.
They stop so they can look towards the back of the bus to observe and search for a "better" seat while standing there blocking all the commuters trying to just move towards the back of the bus. The world has to stop for them while they search for a good seat (is it a feng shui thing?)..
If they find a "better" seat, they will move towards their kill and letting the world revolve once again.
Be glad if they do it once.. because they have the tendency to repeat their reccee acts a few times before they find their desired seats!..

So start training now people.. If you want to attain the titles above.. People have trained all their lives to be the masters..

-- Ginseng Tonic Maker -- Sharing my high..